All the Single Ladies

Let's face it...sometimes singleness is not lighthearted and catchy as the the popular Beyoncé song. If you are like me you will often fluctuate between being okay with being single, enjoy your freedom, like setting your own schedule and doing what you want, when you want to do it. That lasts for a time and then all of the sudden you move to: feeling completely alone in a crowd where there's all these couples, losing it during every chick flic you watch, and curled up on the couch eating chocolate or other sweetness, feeling like no one from the opposite sex even notices you exist.
This morning at church the sermon was about singleness. Which was kind of fitting...since last night had been a not so cheery one for me in that department. Apparently my streak of being content on my own and being "free" had decided it had lasted long enough. During the sermon it was brought up what some people wonder about their singleness and I was surprised to find they were very much like what has ran through my head at one point or another. "What if I am just not content enough with where God has put me right now?" How long do I have to be content for God to bring me a partner?" "Do I just forget about the whole thing?" "Is God trying to tell me I have to be in a certain place in my spiritual walk before He will bring the person into my life?" "What is that certain place?" "What do I need to work on in my life before God brings said person?" "What am I doing wrong?" "What is wrong with me?" "Am I not good enough?" "Maybe I'm hoping for something or someone that doesn't exist."
These are the things that run through our heads sometimes. Sometimes we can be so strong and are committed to our goals and we want nothing to distract us. Then other times we are just dying for someone to share this life with us, look us in the eye and tell us we are the only one for them. (Yeah, a hopeless romantic I hate to admit sometimes.) I have also managed at times to have the worst mesh of both. Angry that you are not being focused enough while your wishing for a special someone that could potentially pull you away from your dreams, but offer you love for a lifetime. Sounds like the making of a Hallmark movie.
Anyway, sometimes singleness downright hurts and sometimes it feels great. How do we take hold of that contentment that the Apostle Paul speaks about in Philippians 4:11-13? I think one of the keys is ultimately our singleness isn't about us. It is about God. He set aside this time for us for a reason. He knows that now is the time when we will be more capable of carrying out this part of His plans with complete devotion than any other time in our lives. We can do this while we don't have a husband or a family to take care of. As single ladies we are to concern our lives with the things of God and how we can best serve Him. (1 Corinthians 7:34) When we get married then we have to concern our lives with all the things that that come with married life in addition to our spiritual duties. God knows what He is doing in this time. He knows our hearts and our conflicted desires because He made us this way; we are women. He knows our loneliness and our worry, but He calls us to step above that because with Him we have all we need. He loves us more than any earthly man could. How can we expect to ever love and be completely devoted to a mortal, imperfect man if we can't stay focused on the perfect Son of God? Now, I don't think God is in heaven shaking his head and saying..."If she gets this part of her life together, and fixes this issue, and tones it down here, then I'll give her a husband".  I believe He simply wants us to see the amazing life he has given us right now being single. We don't need to cut ourselves off from love because it may not go with our plans(who's plans are they ultimately anyway?) or vise versa: our only reason for living is to find a soulmate. Most of us will get married at some point or another. God loves marriage and He created it, but He created it to describe the depths of His relationship between His people and Himself. He is all we need, marriage is just a bonus. He wants us to get out and live and love, not to choose between the two. We can still love those around us as our bothers and sisters in Christ. Every story is different....remember in times of loneliness, He is our true Lover. In times of calm, remember He's got a new opportunity just waiting around the next corner that He wants you to take!