Be Thou My Vision

Hi everyone,
So it has been about forever since I posted last. I wish I could say it was for some totally awesome reason like, I've been in some foreign country for the past 5 months without modern conveniences on a mission trip or backpacking across the US street evangelizing. But let's be honest...the real reason...are you ready for it...? Lack of Vision .Yep, that's it...very adventurous and romantic right? I don't consider myself to be a very creative, genius of a person therefore my wells seem to dry up very quickly. And I've been a dry spell for about 6 months now. About this time I thought I would be clogging this blog full of my new pony party business adventures. But I hit kinda what I would call a rough patch with my job (of course I put it more dramatically than others would; a learning curve sounds better) but I felt like I really needed to get some things figured out and focused on it before I sucked up even more time in my own separate venture. And plus being a procrastinator has been my nemesis sometimes on things, as well as fear of failure hence my crawling back to this blog that I have neglected and to say that my business plans have been put off for another year. I do however, think it was for the best and I am in a much better position now to prepare for next spring, and besides, I have gained some pretty cool resources in the time being that I think are really going to help me do it, and do it right. I guess that is the simple terms explaining the reason why I stopped posting. I felt like the driving force behind writing was the business and everything about it. I mean who really cares about my thoughts on the world or life? Who cares about my struggles and triumphs in my own life? I am just a women with a narrow vision that got blinded when I felt like I had nothing in my life worth talking about. I mean I had nothing exciting or fresh to talk about so what was the point? Soon it became easier and easier to just put off writing anything until I didn't really think about it anymore....until recently.
These past couple of months I feel God has been growing me. I say He does the growing because I gotta be honest, I haven't always been willing but He seems to do it one way or another. ;) Not to mention I have been convicted over a few things as well...pride, laziness, selfishness, hard heartedness...ouch! It stings even as a write and expose it to everyone. Anyway He has been calling me out on some of this stuff and how I need to change things. He has been calling me out on things I need to start doing or get back to doing. And just to touch on one: that is writing this blog again. I hope to write about these other less than attractive traits as well and my observations in my own life in the following weeks because it sounds like so much fun right!? No, because I feel like this is what God is considering the growing process even if it's not so comfortable for me or completely boring to you...sorry.

But what I do want to touch briefly on in this post?...sorry that was a huge introductory but I have a had a huge self-proclaimed fast from this blog. Now for the actually meal here.
I mentioned above the reason for my lack of or I should say one of them was lack of vision. When my business didn't take off I felt like I had nothing to write about. Well, that was because my vision was tiny. I had this initial plan for my blog and what it would entail but that was my vision not God's and I'm figuring out His is so much bigger. I felt like most everything about my blog had to be linked to horses, my dream, and goals but that is not necessarily true now I see. I was stuck on a few topics when God was saying I've got a lot more in store for you to talk about if you would take off the blinders.
Why did I have them on in the first place? I think partially the reason was and still can be, is because sometimes I feel that unless I have something exciting and cool going on in my life then I have nothing worth talking about. To me my life is pretty boring and uneventful...I get up, go to work, go home, do what I got on the agenda to get done at home, got to bed, and repeat. I do good to maybe go out a couple of times a week, maybe. Oh and that includes,  grocery shopping, appointments, etc. :) My life seems so emmbarrasingly dull compare to others I know who are off seeing the world, getting married to a great guy, raising a family, meeting popular people, or posting about their thriving business ventures, mission trips, and spiritual lives. And I'm here cleaning horse stalls, trying to chase after fresh horses, and saving grasshoppers from water troughs. (Those of you who follow me on Snapchat know all about my Snow White adventures ;) How thrilling.
But what I am actually starting to learn in all of this, is that life doesn't have to be the world's definition of "exciting" in order to be full of joy, vision, and impact. It doesn't have to be jammed packed with all these grand adventures that you have to chase. It sometimes is about making adventures out of what comes in your day-to-day path. Now of course I am NOT saying that all the things listed above are not great and awesome things because they are, but for too long I have placed my value as a Christian on those very things. I have lacked vision that my life could be so much more with what I have right now however little it may seem. Sometimes your life may not consist of going to the heart of Africa and building orphanages for children but nurturing the youth in your own community. It may not be serving in Afghanistan, but standing up for the truth in your own country and state and making your voice know. It may not be street evangelizing in Las Vegas, but speaking the truth in love(Eph. 4:15) in your workplace or home. It may not be be starting churches in multiple countries, but starting a group or conversation in your own church. It may not be working two businesses and being a part of ten different organizations, but simply giving your all at the job you currently have. It may not be out worshiping with hundreds of other believers at every concert but sitting with that one person who needs someone to just listen to their pain and to really truly "see" them. It might just mean getting up early on a Sunday morning and spending it alone in a barn, cleaning stalls and having your own church service because someone needed to be with their mother in the hospital as God taught me this morning. God is teaching me that nothing we do is insignificant. It can just either be for His glory or ours. Once again, none of those larger scale things are wrong or should be put down. However it is easy for people like me to feel as if we are not making any difference. But we are. Everything we do has an impact. And our attitude when we do those things has sometimes an even greater impact. Because as believers our attitude needs to reflect Christ in whatever we do. Some people can do the greatest things but have a sour heart. This is something that I have to work on every day because I can fail so easily. And we just need to open our eyes to the bigger vision. We need to view our lives through our Father's eyes. We need to have our Daddy's eyes. And we need to pray for vision. To make what we have going on right now be the best it can be, because we never know what He will ask us to do next. And we are all equally significant and important in His eyes and He has given us a voice.
Let's use it and see what happens.

"Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise
Thou mine Inheritance, both now and always
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art!"

-Be Though My Vision (1912)