Stress Less, Be a Tree!

Hi everyone,
I want to talk about something that I have struggled with this week. And that is stress. My hope is that this can be an encouragement to all of you out there who are over-thinkers, have the over-achiever syndrome, perfectionist syndrome or just have a tendency to over-stress in general. I am a perfectionist in the sense I don't expect others to be perfect but somehow I expect myself to be. I am the one who puts completely unrealistic expectations on my shoulders and growls at myself when I can't reach them. I am the millennial, who honestly loathes being a millennial at times, because of the modern day stereotype and who tells myself that I have to be like people who are 20+ years older than me. I put pressure on myself to be like people who have had many more years life experience and knowledge than me and when I obviously can't be at that level I get frustrated with myself and feel useless. I want to do and learn all these random thing that people my age aren't particularly interested in (Example: I've decided I want to have my own house built someday, therefore I need to know everything about building houses and being my own contractor...yeah I'm odd I know ;) but often I place a burden on myself because I feel that I have got to learn these things not just because I want to, but because I have to prove myself as being "older" than I am. I often do this at work and I struggled with it a lot this past week because I interact mainly with people who are quite a bit older than me on a regular basis. So I've put this cross on my back that I somehow have to handle it all as if I have to prove my value to everyone. And at work this week a lot of things got thrown at me and instead of running to God with my worries and concerns I let stress build up until it spilled out. Then afterwards, I really felt like the immature millennial stereotype that people like to throw out there. That is not how I want people to see me. I want to be knowledgeable, mature, and capable but I need to not take things to the extreme. And I am not a 45 year old. I am a 24 year old surviving and learning in the position I have been given and that is OK! I can strive to be the best I can be for my age but to compare myself against those who have lived longer, worked longer, faced more challenges, and have had more time and experience is completely unfair and literally exhausting! Plus it is not what God wants me to do. He wants me to be confident in the way He made me and in the way He is growing me. He wants me to use what I know so far to help others. Stress is not to be in the equation. Simply striving to be the best you can be for His glory and not to prove that you are worthy to other generations is what should be happening. Stress is defined as "tension" and "pressure" that cause strain and insecurity in the human mind. It prevents you from being your best. It is worry that overtakes your confidence, your joy, and your vitality.
This morning at church it was amazing because every time, the message seems to be exactly what I need to hear. Today the main text was from Psalm 1:1-3. It explains the man who does not follow the path of the wicked but yet: "...his delight is in the Lord's instruction and he meditates on it day and night. He is like a tree planted beside streams of water that bears its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." (vs.2-3 HCSB)
Now I don't know about you but I want to be like that tree! In Jeremiah 17:8 it has the same analogy where the tree "doesn't fear when heat comes and its foliage remains green." The heat came this week and I withered. These verses reminded me of what happens when we do not stay deeply rooted in scripture and prayer and begin to replace God's opinion with the opinion of others. None of us are useless irregardless of where we are at in life. Everyone's story is different and everyone is at a different point in their lives. You don't have to be like everybody else. You don't have to be in this mad dash to always prove that you are worthy of the position that you are in at work, or that you deserve to be someone's friends or that you get noticed by someone. Of course we must strive to be our best but realize that you were chosen for a reason and that there is always room for improvement and it's not a bad thing! 2 Peter 1:1-11 is an excellent passage about to grow in faith like that beautiful tree by the stream. God has given us everything we need for this life to be achievers through His knowledge and understanding. By this "He has given us very great and precious promises so that through them you may share in the divine nature, escaping the corruption that is in this world because of evil desires." (vs. 4) We need to stop relying on our own knowledge and start digging deep into His. We need to stop stressing over the world's approval and seek His in our day to day life. We need to bear fruit and put on His characteristics. (vs.5-7,Galatians 5:22-23) These things will prevent us from being useless (vs.8). And these things will be joy and blessings to our lives. 
When we seek after these things and study His words day and night, it will slowly start block the stress and concerns. They will still keep coming but you will become stronger and better at tossing them up to God and walking on rather than breaking down. But you have to be enveloped in His truth continually and it just so happens that the very days I stray away from my time with Him, the frustration begins to be build until things begin to spill out. This is not the fruit we want to show people. We do not want to be "blind and shortsighted" (vs.9) We want to be the tree that is deeply rooted, getting life constantly from the stream(the Father) and that despite drought, scorching heat, or storms stands calmly and confidently with sweet evidence of God's greatness. That is what people will notice regardless of age and experience. Because if we strive to be what God wants us to be we will receive the greatest acceptance we could ever ask for. "For in this way, entry into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ will be richly supplied to you." (vs.11) We don't have to be a perfectionist for Christ. He has already paid the price because there is no way we could be perfect enough to deserve eternal life. We don't have to over-think is love for us. He simply does despite if we were born knowing how to automatically run a business or not. ;) We don't have to prove that we are good enough for Him by all that we do for our age. We will never be deserving but He died for us anyway.
Join me in trying to stress less and rest more in the Lord's truth. I want to get that joy back. Grow in knowledge and experience and don't take your age either young or old as a curse. Don't let doubts creep in and the devil speak lies to you. When ever those thoughts come in I have decided to make it a point to pray in those moments whatever I am doing. Do fight against the enemies attacks instead of giving in to them. Become the person who stands calmly no matter what chaos is going on in life. Know that you are not alone and also that there are always those in life that have much harder things to deal with. When you fail pick yourself back up, apologize to those around you and learn from your mistakes. It is not always going to be easy but commit to standing the test of time hand in hand with the Lord and be that tree flowing with life.

Tongues of Men vs. Loving in Action

Hi everyone,
So I was reading the other night and I was reading 1 John. I love this little book; it may be small but it packs a punch. ;) And I read one of those verse that you've read so many times only this time you have a complete light bulb moment. "Little children, we must not love in word of speech, but with truth and action." 1 John 3:18 (HCSB) You know when you watch a movie...it could be some sports movie or a war movie or some crisis moment and there is this person that delivers an amazing inspiring speech that just gives everybody the strength to carry on and succeed? Or this character who declares their undying love and loyalty to someone. Yeah so true confession...I've always wanted to be that person. I've wanted to be the one who boosts the moral of an entire group of people or the one to give a troubled friend just the perfect speech they needed to hear when they were struggling. I like to help and encourage people and many times I thought that giving them the "right" words was the best way to do it.
Once eensie weensie problem....I was not born with a silver tongue. Honestly, I can have the brain of a poet sometimes but somehow in translation it comes out as a bumbled jumbled mess. I have always sat back and watched those who always seem to have the just right words to say, the perfect line, the perfect wit, and felt "I better just keep my mouth shut". And the times when I didn't, I would often regret it because it seemed to come out so flat compared to what I hoped. I have viewed people with the gift of eloquence as the 1st choice as friends, for promotions in social circles and jobs and for leadership roles. All the while forgetting one important thing...that we all have different gifts and that simply is not my gift. (Romans 12:4-8) Is it wrong to have the gift of speaking?.. not at all! It is needed, but what I have noticed is society tends to glorify those who speak with power and grandeur. Pop culture glorifies speeches of characters who express their passion in flowery, poetic prose. Much weight is put onto how you can "talk" your way in or out of anything. You want a job, you have to tell the boss all the things he wants to hear so that you will get hired. Irregardless if they are true about yourself. If you want a particular someone to go out with you, you say whatever you think to flatter them so that they will fall for you. Even if they are really just a conquest or an another notch in your belt. It is very easy to fall into the selfish want of a eloquent speaker. Motives must be examined.
1 John 13:16-18 throws a whole new perspective into view. John puts it into the viewpoint of where the rubber meets the road. If you really want  to make a difference, to help people and show you care and love them, love them beyond words. Love them in action. Not always with a five minute speech filled with what you "think" they need to hear, but in doing. It is easy to get caught up in the "I have to come up with the right words to say" or "what to they need to hear right now to appease them?" mentality. Often times I've found, by the time you come up with what you think is the magical words, the opportunity for you to make a difference is already past. I think sometimes rather we should approach people with the "what can I do for them right now" or "how can I show them I care". Now this approach can be taken to the extreme and that does not mean that buying people things all the time or doing absolutely everything for them is the correct way. And words still need to be spoken but don't let your worry of not having the "perfect" words to say prevent you from letting someone know that you value them and that you understand them. I appreciate words of affirmation just as much as the next person, but what warms my heart most is when people do little things to show that they genuinely care. Anyone can throw words out there and then ditch when you need them the most. Be the person who has the ability to give a kind word but backs it up even more so with your actions. I personally love noticing little details about people. I try to remember things about them and either try to bring those up in conversation or in tangible ways that I can bless them. Find out what people like and talk about those things with them, but also find ways to "show" them that you know they care about those things. Make things that they appreciate, (food is always a good option ;), help them on a project, or simply be there for them to just talk to. I am continually learning that listening is an art form. Something that I have read that I am trying to keep in mind in my interactions with people is to not listen to people as they talk with the intention of replying, but rather listen with the intent to understand that person and what they are trying to say. I think we need to make it important to us to truly listen to people. We live in a day and age where most people don't have the time. You've got your problems and I've got mine and it easier to just look at our phones. But when you stop for a minute or sit down with someone and look them in the eye and truly "see" them, you are telling them that they are worth your time and effort. Talk about them and their passions, take an interest in them. You can put off talking about yourself or trying to "fix" their every life situation as if that was your duty. Sometimes all we can do is be a listening ear, offer our honest advice and pray for them. For me my goal is to be the person that is there for people when they need me. And if that means never having the inspiring word of the day that blows everybody out of the water then so be it because that is easily rooted in my own selfish pride anyway. I want to be content in the fact that they know, no matter what, they can come to me and feel safe to spill their heart and I will listen for as long as they need me to.
Jesus spoke many amazing words this we know, but He also backed them up with action. While He was speaking He was reaching out a hand to the young and old, the broken and hurting, the rich and the poor. Not everyone took that outstretched hand but nevertheless He proved He cared. Verse 17 in 1 John 3 says: "If anyone has this world's goods and sees his brother in need but closes his eyes to his need--how can God's love reside in him?" We can talk on and on about how we just love and appreciate people until we are blue in the face but if we choose to overlook their needs and walk away then how are we showing true love? Love is sacrifice. Jesus proved that on the cross. It is about putting ourselves aside and uplifting someone else. It isn't about being noticed, heard and admired. It is about showing someone that their life is valuable and precious and not thinking more highly than you out to of yourself (Romans 12:3). Verse 16 "This is how we have come to know love; He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers." Now that is the picture of ultimate love. You want to show someone you truly care, put them first. "Lay down" things for them. I will use this in the figurative sense but also know that just as Christ physically did, literally laying down your life for someone is the most amazing act of love one could ever be called to do. Now many of us will not be called to do that but know that true loyalty is such a precious trait and it is worth pondering about as you never know what life could bring. Understand that words will fade, speeches will be forgotten, but the way you make people feel when they are around you...that can last a lifetime. Don't despair if you don't have a silver tongue. I feel as if I need to tell myself that every day. ;) But rather remember, many people in the bible did not and it was God's words speaking through them and their actions speaking for them. Just think of Moses and Paul. (Exodus 4:10, 1 Corinth. 2:3-5) Both men were not grand speakers by any means and yet God used them to do amazing things, because they were obedient to His call. God spoke through them and He used their weakness in the speech department to show His power and work to those around them. So don't be afraid to speak at all, just know that even if you stumble and fumble here and there, your effort can mean the world to people and it can cause them to wonder about the courage inside you. But don't forget to back it up with action. Simply being a kind face for someone to talk to or shoulder to lean on can be one of the loving gestures they have received in a long time and at times will speak louder than words ever could. Share Christ's love in you but show it as well. That can make all the difference. Come to think of it we are all beautiful speakers saved by God's grace. We just need to understand we can be speakers from the heart and the hands of service just as well. :)

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal." 1 Corinthians 13:1 (ESV) 

The Time That is Given Us

Hi everyone,
I am back and ready for 2018. Only this year I am going in with a new focus. It is something that has laid heavy on my heart lately and for what it is worth I want to share it. Choose to take from what you will but please hear me out because this may be the single most important post I ever write.
As human beings we all have two things in common. A common ground that is not divided by race, sex, or religion. And that is two dates: our birth date and death date. Now the time in between can be varied, but inevitably if you are alive and breathing right now as you are reading this, then these two dates are the markers of your life. You have passed the beginning and you are living your life in the between, the "dash". And a dash it often seems like. We live in a world that is so fast paced and we have to have everything right now. There is accelerated transportation, accelerated learning, accelerated communication, heck we even got accelerated grocery shopping now. As children we can't wait to get into high school, start driving, graduation, then comes college, living on our own, graduating college, maybe traveling and then marriage, buying a home, having kids, retirement, traveling again and the list goes on and on until we reach the end. Or is some cases, some of us never reach all of those milestones. Somewhere along the way in our anticipation of what comes next, I think we often forget that our life has an expiration date. That we do not reach all these milestones simply because we "think" that is the way life is supposed to go. We lose people every day and somehow we think could never be touched. "I still have so much do with my life and all these plans I've made". "You have your whole life ahead of you", is the common praise I have heard from people. But really do we? Who is mortal man to say how much time you have left on the life clock? Now none of this is to tell people that they should be constantly worried about when they might die. I do not think death is something to feared. For those of us in Christ it is simply the beginning. Now that doesn't mean we go about recklessly with a death wish but that we simply know that we will be in a far better place than this old world when God says it is our time.
People die from life- long sicknesses and the bad choices they make in life and yet others who are completely heathy are not immune to sudden calamity. Accidents happen every day and suddenly the people who thought they had the whole world ahead of them no longer have that chance. Life is but a vapor, a candle that can be snuffed out in an instant.
Now with this in mind the important part...as if I hadn't touched on it already. But this is the part that I desperately ask you to take to heart. We have a decision to make every day that we wake up to another sunrise. How are we going to redeem the time that we have been given?
Are we going to wake up with a smile on our face because we are alive and breathing or grumbling because we have got to run the "rat race" another day?
Are we going to be happy that we have the capabilities we have when so many others cannot see the sunlight, cannot get out of bed in the morning, or cannot drive a car and go to work.
Are we going to be thankful for our health and strength when so many people go through a living hell of pain every day?
Are we going to be grateful that we have a family to visit with when so many have lost theirs?
Are we going to whine while we are sitting in traffic when there are hundreds of wrecks ever day where people don't survive?
Are we going to complain about our difficult co-workers when we have no idea what battles they may be fighting or the past they may have had?
Are we going to grumble in the check-out lane when we should grateful we even have a place to get food when there are starving people in the world?
Are we really going to complain about our lack of a complete wardrobe, fancy vehicle, latest tech gadgets, and the most beautiful home when so many don't have anything but the clothes on their backs and sleep under a park benches?
Are we really going to pick ourselves apart in the mirror when there are people lying in hospital beds who wouldn't even recognize themselves if they did?
How have we become so vain and conceited when we have so much? How many days of our lives do we spend wishing to be someone else or for what we don't have? We act like life is a curse that we just have to bear. The goal is just surviving. Or on the opposite end, the goal is to live it up and "have it our way", use and abuse people and care less about how it may affect them.

For me it is often frustrating to see people walking around in their own little world without care or regard to their fellow man. It doesn't matter if they hurt him, trample on him, or speak uncaringly to him, as long as they get what they want. And it aches my heart when I think of the times when I have brushed people off, when I have chose to look the other way, to tell myself that I was too busy, that it was not my duty. I have been so selfish at times. I get this picture in my head of standing before God and seeing off to the side all the people God put in my path that  I could have helped but chose not to. They stare at me with hopeless betrayed looks on their faces wondering why they weren't worth my time. It breaks my heart and motivates me to strive harder because I don't want that to happen. (Matt. 25:35-40)
Every life is valuable to God including ours and it is high time we start acting like it. (Psalm 139:13-16) Instead of tearing ourselves down and comparing ourselves to others, we need to make use of the gifts and talents He has given us. Stop micro-managing the face in the mirror. Stop trying to be like in the photo-shopped magazines. Stop getting hung up on the materialistic things. Those things aren't going with us when we die so why do we waste so much time on temporary talk pieces? Why do we stand in places and "show off" our accomplishments like the Pharisees (Matt. 23:5-7) when honestly we lose no sleep in our comfy beds over those suffering in the world. Why instead of our hearts breaking when we see people who have lost their way, we turn right around and just say they are getting what they had coming to them? I am not saying that we should feel guilty for what we do have but we have to realize if we are going to talk the talk we have got to walk the walk. If you need an example try the four Gospels about a man named Jesus.

I say it is time we put the phones down and truly see people, become healthier not so we can look sexy in the little black dress, but so we can use our bodies to the best of our abilities to help others, to love our spouses and families more passionately, to say I love you more often, to shut up and listen more, to turn the TV off and read a book, to learn more so we can in turn educate others, to take a walk in God's creation, to snuggle your fur-babies more(which I may be doing right now as I am writing this ;), to spend time with those we care about instead of throwing money at them, and to give every day the best we got.
Dream big, but put those dreams in God's hands; embrace who you are, but strive to be better and more godly. Sing in vehicle with the stereo blasting, dance in rain, taste fresh snow, enjoy the simplest things in life, laugh at yourself instead of being angry at silly mistakes, find out what your co-workers like and bless them, talk to those around you when you go out and find out what their passions are, compliment someone, mentor someone, let go of petty grudges and forgive because let's face it...no one is getting out alive.
We need to slow down and enjoy every moment. Every breath, every step in this life is a precious gift. And as long as we are breathing we have a chance to make things better. We have the ability to become a better person and to make things right. To turn a sour heart into a grateful one and a bitter word into a cheerful one. You gain nothing from shaking your fist at someone. Instead ask yourself if you have every made a bad choice or mistake? You get nowhere telling yourself that you are just not good enough for something or comparing yourself to someone else. You are miserable when you whine and complain about why you don't have the doting spouse with 2 kids and a house with a picket fence by now. Put yourself in someone else's shoes and take a good hard look. Do some souls searching and focus on how to adorn your character, not your body. (Gal. 5:22-24) Stand boldly for what is true and just and don't put so much weight in what other people think of you. They don't determine the purpose of your life.
And most importantly know your purpose in life and strive to help others do the same. I suggest you question your future; you don't have to fear that last date in your life. If you do then I ask that you turn to the One person who can change that for good. Trusting Christ as your personal Savior of your life and choosing where you will spend eternity is the single most important decision you will make in that "dash" between dates. (Rom. 5-8) Don't take it lightly. Your life will never be the same based off of that decision. Read the Bible and of God's great love for you. He wants you to live this life abundantly and with Him you can face anything with the hope, no matter how bleak things may seem. And whenever we get to the end of this life, death will only be a new beginning to an amazing eternity. Meanwhile we were given this life on earth for a reason and to waste it would be a shame. We never know when we will become nothing but a memory so I urge you, won't you give it everything you got and live for more than yourself? Will you make an impact and be beyond what this world expects? I am tired of wasting time on things that honestly don't matter are you? 2 dates how will you choose to live the in-between?

"So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12 (ESV)