A Grateful Heart

Hi everyone,
Got a question for you....would you consider yourself a thankful person? A grateful person? I have generally considered myself as a pretty thankful person until my eyes have been opened I should say lately. And I have found out that I am not near as grateful I should be. I have been trying to read a Psalm about every day and I am currently at Psalm 36. During my reading up to this point I have been noticing a trend with David's writing and that is no matter what the circumstances: good or bad, or what he is dealing with the words "rejoice", "praise", "gladness",  and "joy" continue to come up. Even the times when David is lamenting about how rough his current circumstances are, he still praises God and speak of His goodness.
I have been thinking a lot lately about what makes a life "good". Is it how much we have in our bank accounts, how successful we are at our jobs, how much we have as far as possessions, friends, and recognition in our social circles? Now David's life was not so grand all the time. For as many times there was good there was not so good. He may have slayed Goliath, been king and enjoyed all the benefits that being king brought but he also had his fair share of hard times. He was pursued by Saul who wanted to kill him and lived on the run for a time and he also fell into sin during his reign as king for which he later paid the price. But through it all David managed to praise God with heart of recognition for what God had done for him, even if it was punishment or blessings.
Now I have not been pursued by people set out to kill me or have experienced the luxuries or temptations of being a ruler over a nation, but God is showing me that if a man who went through so much can have such a grateful heart to Him then I need to do some serious thinking about my own heart. Do I really express gratefulness on a daily basis or do I just get caught up in the every day grind of life? When I stop, quiet my mind, and look around, I begin to realize things that I have taken for granted. I  have some how allowed myself to think I  have deserved them because I have worked hard, lived a "decent" life so far and never got into deep trouble. The actual answer is no. Everything I have been given in this life is due to God. Yes, I have worked and saved up for things and accomplished things in my life, but God is the one who has truly guided it all and allowed it to come to pass. Giving me the wonderful godly parents that raised me with morals, truth, and love even when it was hard. The ability to go to an awesome college and grow in my knowledge of the Bible, ministry and equestrian studies. Dear family and friends that have stood by me and been such an encouragement in my life. An awesome job that I love that has allowed me to have a place of my own with my "fur" babies and so much more. Amazing bosses and coworkers who have become my extended family and put up with me. ;) A church family that builds me up. The opportunity to become a small business owner at 24. As I look back everything was guided by God. The pattern of all that has fallen into place can not be by "chance" or "fate" but by His hand.
Now have I always acknowledged this as I should?... no I have not. I have grown complacent, desired the next thing, and taken all that I have for granted. That is somehow a given. And reading Psalms has reminded me that it is not all just a given. As quickly as we can have all these things, they can be taken away in a split second. What we thing we have or what we are going to have, can be changed in an instant. Also if we can't be truly grateful for what we have now, how do we think that something else is going to make us feel that way? We need to open our eyes to blessings all around us. We need to look at our lives with fresh eyes. We need to shut off the world's megaphone blasting of all things we still "need" to possess and look around and see what we already do. The love of our families, spouses, children, the roof over our heads, the ability to pay our bills, food on the table every day, a car to drive, a job to go to, hobbies that we enjoy, pets that bring us happiness, bodies that allow us to get up every morning. Because so many people out there have so much less. So many people out there don't have the abilities we have or the freedoms we have. To sit back at the end of every day and instead of seeing what have and being grateful for it, wishing for and pouting over what we don't is and I am going to be completely honest: downright selfish. And I am going to be the first to admit I have been selfish. I have been blinded to the beauty of the life I have been given and I have not been grateful every day. I have not praised God for is goodness every day because I have chosen to see the darkness instead of the light. I have chosen to believe the devil's lie that I "deserve" more when I don't even deserve God's grace. But if there is something to be grateful for it is this: "But God proves His own love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8 (HCSB)
God chose us even when He saw the underserving ungrateful sinners we were. He came to give us an abundant life. "A thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance." John 10:10 This does not mean that everything will be a gravy train and that hard times won't come, but God wants us to realize all that we have, even through rough times. With Him we are the most blessed people on the face of the earth because we have hope beyond anything we can possess in this world. We have His love and eternal life if we simple choose to accept it and live for it!
Please know that every time we step out your front door it is a blessing, every time we look into a loved one's eyes it is a blessing, every time we receive a paycheck it is a blessing(no matter how many taxes are being taken out ;), whenever we sit down with a full stomach it is a blessing, whenever we receive a text or letter from a friend it is a blessing, when we lay our heads down on our pillows at night in warmth and safety it is a blessing!!
I am asking God to create a heart of true gratefulness in me. I want to take advantage of and enjoy the simplest joys of life. I want to show true appreciation for those around me and in my life. Don't just assume that the people in your life already know it. I am guilty of this because often I am afraid expressing my feelings, that people won't understand. But if this is you, don't be afraid, most people want real not perfect. And if you think that expressing appreciation shows emotional weakness, let me tell you that couldn't be farther from the truth. Take the time to show it, speak it, and live it. Psalm 34:1 says: "I will praise the Lord at all times; His praise will always be on my lips." We are to continually and vocally praise our God for all that He is done and will continue to do. "...For the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart." Matthew 12:34 This verse is a good gauge for our level of thankfulness. Do we speak with gratefulness or does bitterness come out? What is coming out of our mouths every day to God and to others? Are we truly praising God for what He has done or complaining about what we don't have. Now understand that it is not wrong to desire to better your life and to wish for certain things, but understand there is a fine line between desiring what is truly beneficial or what is actually an idol in our lives. Test it against Scripture. Look at what you already have ask yourself, if I cannot be grateful for what I have now, how can I be entrusted with more?
So just as we are to be continually praising God and being thankful for His blessings in our lives take that as a reminder to be outwardly thankful to the other people in our lives. Don't take them for granted. Tell them how grateful you are for them, spend time with them, send them a text or a letter, do little things for them to make their lives easier, be there for them. Cherish and take care of the possessions you do have, be good stewards of what you have been given or what you are in charge of. Gratefulness is not just lip service, remember it overflows from the heart...it is an action as well. David "danced before the Lord", he played music, he sang. Also it is a great testament to others. So many out there are searching for joy. So many are going through dark times. If they can see joy in our hearts that isn't based solely off of our possessions and status in the world, but off of something greater, that is going to raise questions. A thankful heart no matter what is going on in our lives is going to be eye catching to people. For those of us who have been blessed with a relatively "easy" life up this point we'd better be humbled and use our thankfulness not as a flag to be waved in front of those who are struggling, but as a call to share our good fortune with others. We have a job to do and I pray to God we don't waste what He has given us. Those who are currently struggling very real, very ugly, battles right now: God loves you beyond what anyone could do for or say to you in your current situation and He can create joy out of nothing if you seek Him. Don't take my word for it, take His.
So we all have a choice. To be grateful every day of our lives and express this gratefulness or to let the day to day routine numb us to the blessing that life is. The devil seeks to blind us from the beauty, the hope of this life;  may we not let him win. Join me by getting into the Word, studying what it means to have a truly thankful heart and what that life looks like to the world. It will take time and yes even a certain amount of discipline. In a way it is a habit that must be created if it not something we do already on a daily basis. Make the time to spend even if it is just one minute a day, to reflect and thank God for what He has given you or done for you. I think you will realize quickly that a minute doesn't become long enough and my hope is that we will grow into continually praising Him for is goodness, mercy, and grace in our lives all the day long. In the words of one of my favorite hymns from Frances J. Crosby, who I may add became blind shortly after birth: " Perfect submission, all is at rest. I in my Savior am happy and blest. Watching and waiting, looking above. Filled in His goodness, lost in His love. This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long; This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long." It honestly brings me to tears, imagining a woman who went her whole life without seeing the things that we enjoy in this beautiful world, praising God completely when she could have very easily chosen to be bitter. Now that is a heart of true and pure gratefulness. That is a heart I want, how about you?

Our True Love

Hi everyone!
So I have been pondering about this post for a couple of weeks now. It is February and if you have turned on the TV, listened to the radio, walked into a store, or basically went anywhere, then you know the big deal about this month: Valentine's Day. Now as a single gal it is no secret Valentine's Day is not exactly the one I look forward to every year. Being completely honest I have been on both sides of the spectrum...well both polar opposite sides of the me plus zero spectrum. Feeling sorry for yourself and wondering where you went wrong, to disdain for anything romantic and "true love is dead" mentality. But I have to say this year is different...and no this is not the part where I make some grand announcement about some great guy I have met. I am still unattached as they come, but let me tell you I have discovered my love life. This past month I have been discovering more about someone who has been in love with me before I was even born. Someone who knew what I would look like, what my personality would be, what my gifts would be, what my hopes and dreams would be, what my weaknesses would be, and what my struggles would be. And through the struggles I have faced in the past few weeks that have led me to face some insecurities in my life, I have experienced what I would call nothing short of "TRUE love". Can I tell you more about this dream date? They "know me" and "understand my thoughts", they know my habits, likes and dislikes and "my ways", they know my mind and what I want to say before I say it, they will "hold on to me" no matter where I run when I am afraid (And believe me I am good at running away), their thoughts over me are more than I can fathom, they "outnumber the grains of sand", and when I wake up they are still there. They never leave me when I mess up and fall short. They don't let me push them away when I feel not good enough. They love me no matter what. Sounds like the traits many of us desire in a significant other right? Loyalty, honesty, understanding, forgiveness, and encouragement. Now who is this amazing person? Well He is better than any mere human being. He is our God and Savior Jesus Christ. The other day I read Psalm 139 which is the chapter to which I referenced above in italics. When I read it, I had one of those revelation moments and honestly I lost it. Psalm 139 is not considered by most biblical scholars to be a love letter to us, but I felt as if I was reading one and it broke me. All I have ever wanted is to be understood, for people to take the time to get to know me, know what I like and don't like, know what makes me smile and laugh, be there for me when I am hurting and when I am happy, to love me when I mess up and to never give up on me. And here I was reading these words: "Lord, You have searched me and know me." (vs. 1) The word "know" as been used in the Bible to refer to the upmost level of intimacy. The intimacy that is found in marriage relationships, to truly belong to someone body and soul. "You understand my thoughts from far away". (vs. 2) He understands me in a world where I often feel as if no one does and when sometimes I can't even understand myself. "...Your thoughts...how vast their sum is! If I counted them they would outnumber the grains of sand; when I wake I am still with You." (vs. 17,18) He is thinking about me all the time and never leaves my side.
This caused me to really ponder about the upcoming holiday of Valentine's Day. I mean there is a reason why even as early as January 2nd we are bombarded by hearts, cupids, chocolate, flowers, cards, and everything sappy and romantic. Because people crave it. There is reason why jewelry stores really push ads during this time, why about every store has a Valentine's section, and why kids pass out valentines at parties at school. Because love is a big deal to people. Human nature craves to be loved, understood and appreciated by people. We want to be worth something and we try to find that validation from people. Now we also know how that can goes as well. Broken hearts, binge eating discount chocolate, sitting on the couch watching chic flicks with a box of tissues...and I digress...but anyway Valentine's Day can be one of the happiest and saddest days of the year for people. Now I can also go on about how I don't really get the Valentine's Day hype because why should we choose just one day out of the year to do something "extra" special for our significant others. I mean shouldn't that be something you do more often than one day a year? But I think the root of this holiday comes from our simply desire to be wanted by someone. For us to be the center of someone's universe even if it just for one day.
If only everyone could realize what I am starting to realize in my thick skull. ;D That we already are the center of Someone's universe. The Creator of the universe. He is so deeply in love with us that knew us before we were even born. He created us in our mother's womb (Ps. 139:13) He watches all that we do and protects us. He loves us so much that He gave up His son for us even when we were underserving. (Rom. 5:8) Honestly let it sink in that a perfect God can love us that much when a human being can walk out on us for almost anything now days. This world has turned love into a game, a fake reality show, a money making scheme, when the whole time God is standing waiting for us to figure out he isn't leaving when we run out of money, lose our job, don't go to the gym or the salon every month, or more wrinkles start to show. When things get tough and our ugliness and sinful nature comes out He doesn't run away. He sometimes has to show us tough love but He helps us through it even when it's hard. We have been accepting the world's cheap imitation of love and missing out on the real thing.

Now based off of this revelation, this has led me to a new outlook on Valentine's Day. Each and everyone of us is created uniquely by God. We have "been remarkably and wonderfully made". (Ps. 139:14) We all have our different personalities, characteristics, quirks, and talents that make us unmatched to any other person in the world. There is only one YOU in this world and there will never be another one exactly like you again. So the comparison games MUST stop and believe me it isn't easy but we can do it. Acknowledge that when God looks at you and sees you for all that you are: the good and the bad, the strengths and the weaknesses; He still LOVES you. Now this also means that He loves you enough to show what you need to work on as well. He loves you enough to push you towards His truth even if it isn't comfortable at times. We must recognize sin and flee from it. Now days people will walk away instead of showing someone they love them enough to push them towards godly excellence in their lives so do not take godly chastising lightly. Be grateful He loves us enough to chastise us when we are in the wrong.

Also Valentine's Day has become just one of the many days I have decided to celebrate a God who created me in His image, who loves me enough to tell when I need to straighten up and who encourages me every day when I need it. I want to celebrate the God who loves me more than any human being ever will. I also want to celebrate all those in my life who have loved me, stood by me and been an encouragement to me. Valentine's Day is generally been viewed as mainly for couples but I think there are many of those in our families and friends who deserve our wholehearted thanks for sacrificing for us and being there for us when we needed them. Show that you appreciate them and their love for you. If you are single go out with other single friends or a family member whose spouse has passed away.
And lastly, instead of dwelling on a relationship that I may not have, I want to take the time to show my fellow man that I care. There are of course different kinds of love and what we show to our spouses and family are not the same as what we show to everyone we just meet, but we must recognize that every human being has a purpose and has a need to be loved. So many of them don't know God's love or they feel completely lost. We need to be the one who shows them a glimpse of God's love. A simple act of kindness: opening the door for someone, a smile in the checkout line, a "how are you" to a random stranger who doesn't expect it, patience with someone who is struggling. Everyone needs to know that they are loved beyond compare by God. I have been doing an experiment lately and trying to becoming better at showing godly compassion to others I come in contact with and I am honestly surprised at the results I get. I hope to share more about this in a future post, but the main point that I am trying to get across and I have been writing a book to get to is: Valentine's Day I have decided does not have to be just for those in a relationship and those who are can do so much more.
For those of us who are in relationships and maybe even more so for those of us who are not, we should take the time to recognize the greatest love of all. The love our Heavenly Father has for us and how we should respond to that. If you truly love someone what do you do? You usually spend time with them, think about them often, try and do things that make them happy. Do we do these things for the One who loves us unconditionally? Or do we put Him off for just one day of the year? Do we tell Him we are too busy or we can't do that because we might have to sacrifice a little something? How can we expect to fully love our spouses or potential future spouses if we can't even take the time to love the One who gave everything for us? I personally want to fall in love with my God more and more and fully put on the true meaning of love before I have a plus one because I want to give him my all. Therefore I need to make God my all.
Instead of focusing on what earthly love we do or do not have, maybe we should spend more time on reading about His love for us and how we are to share that love with others. Love is to be selfless. Maybe we should work on putting on the characteristics of love in our hearts than expecting to receive it all the time from others. Or maybe we should stop lying on the couch thinking that we have some disease that makes us unlovable and start living as people who have a faithful God. (Jer. 31:3) Whether or not you are single or attached this Valentine's Day put on a mindset that you are very much loved by the single most important Person who could ever be in your life. He is our Valentine and our True love. Only until we are able to be loved by Him can we truly love others. Let people see the joy in your life as you let God's love pour through you and out of you. Let that be you mission. Go out on a date with God this February 14th. I know I am and I am excited. Strive to "know" Him better and better each and every day beyond that. It will be so rewarding, trust me I can feel it!

"For I am persuaded that not even death or life, angels or rulers, things present or things to come, hostile powers, height or depth, or any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!" Romans 8:38-39 (HCSB) 

Running the Race

Hello everyone,
So yesterday with Brooklyn, my mom and I went on a dog hike/scavenger hunt put on by our local state park. It was a great way to get out in the middle of the winter slump and enjoy time in the woods with four-legged friends. Throughout the park on trails there were markers that you had to find worth different amounts of points. Whoever at the end of the day had collected the most points won a prize at the end. Now my mother and I figured this would be a pretty simple task as we walk regularly at the park, until we got our map and realized that almost every trail in the park had these markers on them and we only had about 4 hours to get as many as we could. Now we really wanted the prize(free year park pass) and we decided we were going to do our best to come in first. It was funny because this casual day of hiking turned into two woman treating it like it was the Amazing Race and we had to strategize and maximize our time to get to our goal. This was pretty serious business and we got really into it! By the time it was all said and done we hiked on six different trails and covered just about 9 miles with Brooklyn towing me along towards the end. We were utterly exhausted and my legs have never been so sore, but at the end of the day we won our prize! But I got to admit going to the park to hike doesn't sound so grand right now, haha!

Now people who know me really well, know that my mind likes to process and dig out meaning beyond the face value of most things.  For example, a horseback ride is not just a horseback ride for me and a hike is not just a hike for me. It is an event that triggers deep thoughts, often spiritual thoughts about life and the world around me. So this day was not any different. As I have thought more about it more, a verse came to my mind. "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it." 1 Corinth. 9:24 (ESV) In this verse Paul is not actually talking about a physical race like in the Olympics but is referring to the spiritual race of the calling of Christ. Even though what we were doing was not an actual foot race, it was a "race" against the clock to see what all we could get accomplished and how far we could go before time was up. I relate this to our spiritual life. We gave a goal, a prize, that we want to reach before our life. For our physical race we had to have our gear: appropriate clothing and shoes, map, snacks and anything that helped us on our hike. In the same way we have to have our salvation, the Holy Spirit, the Bible and other things to help us on our spiritual journey. During the hike because we wanted to win the prize of the park pass we had to strategize and maximize our efforts to accomplish what we needed to. Sometimes that meant changing our original plans due to unforeseen circumstances. In the same way in our spiritual walk, we need to think about the best way to accomplish our calling from God and follow His "map" the Bible, but understand that sometimes things will not always go according to our plan. Therefore, there will be times where we will have to adjust and refocus on what He is asking of us. Despite the things that distracted us at times on our hike we kept our goal in focus which kept us driving on productively. "So I do not run aimlessly..."   1 Corinth. 9:26 Even in our spiritual lives the things that seek to distract us must be overruled by our focus on the prize so we are not "running" in circles but actually getting closer to our goal. Now I want to be clear, this does not mean that everything is a rush in this life and that we neglect to take the time to grow in the ways we need to. We had to stop on the trail and make sure that we were writing down our markers correctly otherwise they would not have done us any good being wrong. In the same way, if we want to succeed, we have to take our time to make sure we are stopping to do what God asks of us along the way so that when we get to the end we have truly accomplished His calling. Not in our frenzy to be super-spiritual Christian who is more deserving and above everyone else.
Now what exactly is this spiritual prize? I believe Paul states it best in Philippians 3:14: "I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward calling of God in Jesus Christ." The upward calling that ultimately leads to our home in heaven with our Lord and Savior. This is the greatest prize we could ever run after. God's calling in our lives is so important and I have realized just as we were so intent on earning our earthly prize yesterday, I need to take that same fervor towards my spiritual race. I need to have the same determination even when I getting tired and "sore" to keep on pressing forward towards what will make it all worth it. ..."forgetting what lies behind and straining toward to what lies ahead." Phil. 3:13 We have to learn from and move on from what we laid down in our past, what Christ has forgiven us from. We have to move on from what trips us on the trail. We have to put off our sin. We have to carry on with a desire in our hearts to be the best we can be for what God is calling us to do. There are things in my life that have been weighting me down and preventing me from "running my race" to the best of my ability. Weariness has clouded my vision at times. I want to throw those things aside and keep going even when it is hard, even when it seems all uphill, and even when I am exhausted. And honestly, it makes me wonder as Christians, how would our lives be different if we started chasing after our calling with as much fervor as we do for the physical trophies in our lives, the job advancements, the recognition of others, and the success of those we see in magazines? If we put that much effort into reaching God's goals for our lives how much different would our spiritual life be? I think we would be much more joyful and fulfilled. So as I am sitting here resting my aching muscles but feeling satisfied at the accomplishment, I can't help but wonder what it would be like to get to heaven and rest my soul for eternity as I sit at the feet of the Father: my ultimate prize and my ultimate treasure, satisfied I gave everything I had. Let us get into His Word and run the race with the determination to see His face and to hear a job well done.

"Therefore since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight , and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us." Hebrews 12:1